Also in the news...

• Those crazy Syrian kids -- they grow up so fast: Boy, 5, engaged to girl, 3.

Also in the news...

• CELEBRITY ALERT: Her genes will go on: Celine Dion gives birth to twin boys.


• I beg to differ -- because I feel irrevocably stupider: Mom's brains grow bigger after giving birth.

Also in the news...

• Thinking of blowing off that parent-teacher conference? Better think again if you're in Detroit.

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• May a dingo never get your baby: Famous case reopened.


• CELEBRITY ALERT: He thinks he's tire-d now: Andrew Firestone and wife expecting second baby.


• Here, here: If you want to raise smarter babies -- men should do more household chores.


• Maybe we're getting a wee bit too dependent on technology: Man loses iPod, accidentally impregnates wife.

Also in the news...

• Baby daddy drama: Widow fights for court order to get dead husband's sperm injected -- into dead guy's mistress.


• Should've laid off the Poking: Teachers fired for inappropriate Facebook contact with students.


• Maybe you don't want your kids' school to provide that good of an education: Kid turns in parents for pot in response to DARE anti-drug program.

Also in the news...

• Damn, I knew I shouldn't have gotten that Pitocin shot before I pulled out my Glock: Woman goes into labor while robbing Walmart.

I Feel Sad for Him, But I Really Want to Hug Him

The real story should be the boy in the middle,

who possesses the strength to knock the big guy over!

The Sun has a story today about a boy in China who is 3 years old and weighs a whopping TEN STONE, which is, uh...140 pounds — and the boy does look as if he weighs as much as 10 large rocks.

No one knows why this not-so-little boy is the way he is, though it's likely a hormonal issue. The article notes that the he's been banned from several nurseries because he is a "health hazard" — to other kids. We're not sure what that means — are they afraid he's going to eat the other children?

I will admit, though, that if I dropped off Sasha (all thirty-something pounds of her, and she's tall for her age) at daycare and saw she had a classmate that was that big, I'd be concerned, considering that I didn't weigh a buck-forty until I added my Freshman 15 in college.

Also in the news...

• Better think twice before you cram that Krispy Kreme down your throat: How your weight affects your kids' obesity levels.

Also in the news...

• VIRAL VIDEO: I thought Grover needed a good close shave: Sesame Street spoofs Old Spice ads.


• CELEBRITY ALERT: Hannah Montana's fall from grace: Parents riled about new Miley Cyrus video.

At Least They're Not All Named Antonio Jr.

How? HOW? He had sex with them, that's how!

If you think having eight children à la Jon and Kate is irresponsible or just plain crazy, than Antonio Cromartie probably won't secure your vote for Father of the Year.

As the above New York Post headline notes, the Jets cornerback has fathered at least nine kids with eight women. Better that than eight kids with nine women, I suppose!

A real mack daddy, with his wife, the mother of kid #8.

Also in the news...

• Wanna live in a soup can? Prefab housing takes a new route.

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• A surfeit of Iron Man, not so much iron: Doctors lament a lack of the ol' Fe in kids' diets.


• Tired of all your crap getting decimated by your little angels? Commiserate on ShitMyKidsRuined.com.


• HOLIDAY HUBBUB: Who cares if he wants to be Spiderman for the fifth time: Beats these totally inappropriate Halloween costumes.

Also in the news...

• Who needs a naughty chair when you've got duct tape? Mom, boyfriend charged after adhering toddler to wall.


• Wine of the times? Colleges offer vino-tasting, levitation, and other classes we're sure you didn't anticipate paying for when you set up that 529.


• Looking to get all sexed up for Halloween? Go as a character from a kid's show.


• Even worse than being an ex-hooker turned elementary school teacher and having all the parents all over you (figuratively)? Having Andrea Peyser on your case.