If I Were Mormon, I'd Have to Choose a Favorite Wife

There are a number of things I could bring up to bore a therapist, but complaining about my parents playing favorites isn't one of them. My brother and I were born 51 weeks apart (I was born exactly a week before his 1st birthday), but we were mostly treated as twins. Though I received much hand-me-down clothing, we usually got two of everything as gifts, and we were punished rather equally, often even if only one of us was misbehaving.

So I don't find myself fighting the issues that affect the people mentioned in Psychology Today's blog. The post cites the work of a couple of university researchers who say that "meeting the needs of one of your children is far more acceptable to the other children if they perceive the 'special' treatment as fair."

Well, no kidding. Of course, the parent probably doesn't see the perceived favoritism or considers it temporary or justified, so it's important to explain to the other kid why you're spending that extra time with his or her sibling.

So far it hasn't been (to my knowledge) much of an issue with my kids. It helps that Sasha is 3, so she's either oblivious or retarded to what's going on most of the time. That they're different genders will probably also help in the long run, because there won't be as much apples-to-apples competition. But as of now, I can't see myself actually favoring one over the other, though each has a way of making me dislike him or her more than the other from time to time. Read more...