Also in the news...

VIRAL VIDEO: Hopefully they won't wash out her potty mouth with that industrial liquid soap that's usually found in school lavatories: Mom arrested for cussing out principal.

WTF, MOM! Well played, naked drunk shoplifting lady, well played: Mom who stripped for cops to avoid going to jail is -- going to jail.

See, it does pay to be uncool: Wired magazine's GeekDad picked as best parenting blog.

Talk about working up until the last minute: Ex-prostitute pimped out during entire pregnancy, ordered to parenting classes by court.

Can't say I wouldn't have reacted the same way if my own ravenous kids were screaming in the back seat: Woman punches through drive-through window at McDonald's that ran out of Chicken McNuggets.

Filed under "No Shit, Sherlock": Texas officials guess three pot-bellied pigs released in high-school hallways "likely a senior prank."

CELEBRITY ALERT: As if the movie wasn't freaky enough on its own: Catch a glimpse of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory's Veruca Salt, Augustus Gloop, and Mike Teevee—all growed up.

Binky bad-ass: 4-year-old calls police to turn in his pacifiers.

The Morgan Freeman of Korea: Teacher curses at students and beats them with shovels -- and they adore him for it.

Stripper pole dad doesn't like being called stripper pole dad: Pennsylvania patriarch asks for change of venue in underage drinking case.