Chuck Norris Has Something to Say

Chuck Norris does not like Obamacare.

Chuck Norris can breast-feed a baby with his fist. When Chuck Norris was born, he slapped the doctor. When Chuck Norris sings "Old MacDonald," all the animals sound like Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris IS the farmer in the dell. A Happy Meal is a Happy Meal only because Chuck Norris says so. Chuck Norris can toilet-train a toddler in three minutes using only his left eyebrow. Chuck Norris baby-sits rabid bobcats.

Chuck Norris knows what to expect when he's expecting. And when you're with Chuck Norris, you'd better expect a beatdown.